Rethinking Speaking The Truth In Love
If you have been in church for any length of time, you have probably heard people talk about “Speaking the truth in love” (Eph 4:15a), or you have used it yourself.
We typically use this phrase when we have something negative to say about someone or their behaviour that is out of step with Christ but wants to do so in a loving way. This is an important role that every believer in a kingdom community ought to engage in, but it is called admonishment (Rom 15:14), not speaking the truth in love to a believer.
The first thing to remember is that the truth is in Jesus Christ (Eph 4:21). A believer may lie, steal, cheat, envy, shout at people, or be moody, which are all expressions of the flesh. However, all these things may be factual in that the believer actually did them, but they are not the Truth about the believer.
The Truth is always in Christ….what is True about a believer is separate and distinct from what they do or don’t do. What is True about them is always what they are and who they ARE IN CHRIST! This explains why Paul could write to the church at Corinth, which was doing some horrendous things, and still call them saints at the beginning of his letter.
So, speaking the truth in love to a believer, we would tell them what is true about them in Jesus:
– You are complete and perfect right now (Col 2:10, Heb 12:23)
– You are the righteousness of God (2 Cor. 5:21)
– The Father loves you to the exact same degree that He loves Jesus (John 16:27, John 20:17)
– You are fully accepted by God (Eph 1:6-7)
– He sings songs over you (Zep 3:17)
– You are His delight, and He finds no flaw in you in Christ (Song of Songs 4:7)
– You have died to your passions (Gal 5:24)
– Your old man has been crucified, and now you are a new creation (Rom 6:6, 2 Cor 5:17)
– You are in absolute peace with God (Rom 5:1-2)
Paul expected us to speak the truth (as it is in Jesus) in love with each other all the time. But why, you ask? To experience the reality of the other half of the same verse.
“Eph 4:15 Rather, speaking the truth in love, we are to grow up in every way into him who is the head, into Christ.”
When we constantly hear what we are in Christ, we then begin to grow into who we are in Christ.
This begs the question, where does this idea come from? The church reflects God’s Triune (community) nature in heaven. The Persons of the Godhead were the first to speak the truth in love to each other, and now, as the church, we do the same.
Here is how the Trinty speak the truth in love to each other.
Heb 1:12: “Like a robe, you will roll them up, like a garment they will be changed. But you are the same, and your years will have no end.” (Father to the Son by The Spirit)
Psalm 45:7: “You love righteousness and hate wickedness; therefore God, your God, has set you above your companions by anointing you with the oil of joy” (Father to the Son by The Spirit)
Ps 40: 8 – 10: ” I desire to do your will, my God; your law is within my heart I proclaim your saving acts in the great assembly; I do not seal my lips, Lord, as you know. I do not hide your righteousness in my heart;
I speak of your faithfulness and saving help; I do not conceal your love and faithfulness from the great assembly. (Son to The Father by The Spirit)
So the next time you see a brother or sister, go up to them and speak the truth in love because we all need to be reminded of who we are in Christ, especially when we fall short.
